Everybody is so nice!

I think people are really nice. I’m not talking in an aesthetic way (which people are beautiful), but I mean in the way they treat others. Perhaps its naive to have the belief that everyone is genuinely nice. That is of course unless their superhero/anti-hero backstory warranted some kind of negative disposition. However, I don’t think that gives anyone the right to be a complete asshat.

In thinking that everyone is nice also causes problems when I’m talking to people.

I don’t recognize flirting.

Its true.

Friends have had to tell me when they’ve noticed someone flirting with me. A coworker once pointed out that another one was flirting with me because it was clearly going over my head. And my only response was to be nice back.

I do notice flirting when someone is trying too hard. If we’re acquaintances, and have never had a very long conversation before, and suddenly you’ve taken an interest in me, I might find it suspicious.

As a writer and an ambivert, I’ve spent my life observing people from the background. How they interact with others, how they are alone, etc. I have a pretty good idea how people are around someone they have an interest in.

One morning two of my friends and I went to a nearby diner for breakfast. We were seated at the counter being served by a young man who seemed to be learning the ropes as a server. While waiting for our seats to open up, I had spent two cups of coffee observing him interact with customers and other servers.

This baby-faced kid was probably a high schooler, if not recently graduated. He had finely gelled hair, bright blue eyes, and a very infectious smile.

After patiently checking on us a few times, he returned to take our orders. Both of my friends seemed unable to speak once they saw his features. I ordered my waffles and banana bread without hesitation–I really wanted that banana bread–and he disappeared to put in our orders and focus on his tasks.

My friend A turned to me. “I never thought I’d notice how you don’t react to people,” she said.

I blinked. “What do you mean?”

“He came over and started talking to us for our orders and both M and I fumbled with our orders while you were very direct,” she said. “Its because he’s gorgeous and you ordered like he was any other server.”

“He’s a nice person. All he’s done since we’ve been seated and any person has come into the diner has been to talk to them. Its good customer service,” I said. I did notice his striking features, but ordering my banana bread was way more important.

People are nice; both aesthetically and in their personalities. And that’s how I’ve always seen them.

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One thought on “Everybody is so nice!

  1. This not only made me laugh, but restored my faith in humanity (just a little) I think that people are “nice” but I tend to find the basis of that is due to something about you that they find attractive.

    It may not necessarily be a sexual attraction, but some people really do have an indiscernible “something” about them that draws you in…maybe the fact that you almost ignore flirting is the trait that will draw others to you…without you even trying! : )

    Liked by 1 person

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